What Diving the Maze Taught Me About God’s Presence in Darkness

Life can feel like diving in the Maze, a site full of shadows. Murky bluegray abysses lie beyond the cliff edges, swirling through sheer canyons, darkening the underside of every ledge and crack. The twisting walls and cliffs of the Maze are filled with caves and swimthrough tunnels. Alienlike life dangles from the walls in the form of leathery algae and encrusting sponges. Where corals grow, the landscape is angular and sharp, with punctuated bursts of color lying in shade, spreading wide in rarer patches of shallow sunlight. Flurries of fish fly between ridges like barn swallows darting aggressively between buildings and tree branches. In rocky tunnels and caves, bigger fish await. Flabbylipped goliath groupers the size of cars snooze within their territory’s shadows. Razortoothed barracuda hover in the canyons. Silver-silhouetted reef sharks patrol the Maze’s perimeter.

Experiencing God’s Presence in Darkness

As my dive buddy watches me disappear over an edge of the Maze, I feel as though I am slowly free-falling into a dark canyon. The blackness below seems to reach up to swallow me, gently revealing its creepy inhabitants. Shadows wrap around me. In this deep crevasse between textured walls of rock and coral, overgrown with algae and crawling things, I hover over a soft patch of creamy sand and take stock of my surroundings.

I turn to look back over my shoulder and glance upward to where sharp outlines of corals, algae, and other photosyntheticreliant organisms fringe the canyon’s edge, spangled in sunlight so bright that I squint. The meandering, darting, and dancing silhouettes of fish punctuate the scene above, at the center of which is my dive buddy, a sleek presence softly floating, working her way along the edge, all the while looking for me.

I am never far from my dive buddy. But the fact that she cannot see me drives home a realization. I can see her, and I am assured of her presence as I watch her silhouette glide above the reef. And yet I am invisible to her sight. She watched me disappear into the bluegray abyss, a trail of bubbles to mark my path, but she can no longer see where I am. My dive buddy knows that I am near, but since she can no longer even see my bubbles, she must rely on the knowledge of my character and our relationship to know that I am not far from her. That I have not left her. That even though she cannot see me, I am keeping a keen eye on her.

Perhaps it is like this with God. God can see in all places, even the darkest and most shadowy ones. Anywhere we go, most assuredly, he is there first. If we are in a pit of despair, he is with us, even as he is silent. We may not be able to sense him, but as we seek to accomplish his will, he promises to go with us.

But now, O Jacob, listen to the Lord who created you.
O Israel, the one who formed you says,
“Do not be afraid, for I have ransomed you.
I have called you by name; you are mine.
When you go through deep waters,
I will be with you.
When you go through rivers of difficulty,
you will not drown.
When you walk through the fire of oppression,
you will not be burned up;
the flames will not consume you.
For I am the Lord, your God,
the Holy One of Israel, your Savior.”
Isaiah 43:1-3

Truth in the Depths: God’s Presence Is Constant

We may feel alone, but God’s presence is there beside us, perhaps just out of sight. When we are required to dive into unknown waters, we are told that God is there too. When we are called to swim through deep rivers, we know that God goes with us. When we must walk through fire, we remember the one who is greater than the flames. When we are humiliated or frustrated or anxious or talked down to, or even when we are called to do something that is impossible, we can be assured that God goes with us and that he is active. When God is silent as we cry out to him, we can know that his quietness has a purpose. If he chooses not to speak, it is for a reason. We may not be able to see or hear him now, but that does not change the Truth that he is with us and that he sees and hears us. His presence and his love have not left us. He promises they never will.

Looking Back: Seeing God’s Presence After the Darkness

The silhouette of my dive buddy reminds me of another aspect of God’s presence. As the diver shrouded in darkness at the bottom of a marine trench, I have to look over my shoulder and up in order to see her. Her presence is visible to me, but sometimes only in hindsight. The same has been true of God’s presence in my life. Only after coming out of seasons of silence and the pit of despair did I eventually see that God was with me all along. It took a while to see Truth.

Learning to Wait for God’s Presence in Darkness

Truth does not change when our circumstances do. It remains constant when everything else in our world is volatile, when we are plagued with uncertainty, doubt, and despair. When we choose to seek after and remember Truth, we are able to wait for God’s presence.

In these hard moments, beauty still abounds, like being surrounded by unique creatures and sunlit silhouettes in an underwater canyon. Dark times may offer the greatest potential for growth, beauty, relationship, and interaction with the Kingdom of God. The silence is where we learn to listen for his voice. The darkness is where we see the streams of light pour in, making the true shapes of things clear. The stillness is where we find space to sit still, to seek Truth and relationship with God in raw and unique ways. Despair can be a posture in which we experience his healing and rescue as we’re drawn into greater reliance on him. Not only may there be a purpose to these seasons, but maybe they are designed by a loving God to provide us with immeasurable blessings.

Each time I dive into the Maze, the familiar eerie feeling ebbs at my mind once again, inviting me over the cliff edge into a hazy, blue unknown. In some sense, of course, I already know what’s down there. As I descend into shadows, I gaze upward to see light pouring itself onto the colorful ridgetop, edged with life and glory, as the distinct silhouette of my dive buddy glides smoothly across the ridge. In the silence of the depths, I feel as though I am looking back on a moment in time, a place I have been, with a clear understanding of God’s presence—as though I can see his silhouette in the Maze.

Adapted from If the Ocean Has a Soul: A Marine Biologist’s Pursuit of Truth through Deep Waters of Faith and Science by Rachel G. Jordan, releasing in June 2025.

Rachel G. Jordan is a professional marine biologist and lay theologian. A self-professed Jesus-loving coral nerd, she was raised in Idaho and has since traveled the globe chasing her passion for faith and science. She has an MS in marine biology and ecology from James Cook University (Australia), a BS in ecology from Seattle Pacific University (USA), and a certification in biblical studies from Bodenseehof Bible School (Germany). In addition to working as a coral biologist for the US National Park, Rachel has worked in marine aquaculture research, organic chemistry laboratories, veterinary research facilities, the pet industry, and a museum. When not diving or writing, she can be found reading C. S. Lewis, growing wildflowers, and exploring creation with her husband. Her most recent book, If the Ocean Has a Soul, releases with Tyndale House Publishers in June 2025. You can also find her on Instagram @shorelinesoul or at rachelgjordan.com.