Why Christians Must Let Go of Control
The stars are always brighter when you drive up into the Rocky Mountains. But one night during the first week of my final year in college, I didn’t make the drive joyfully. I was frustrated.
I was an intern at a ministry called the Annex, a college ministry that had been playing a pivotal role in my faith journey.
In the summer, the ministry was a lot more laid back since most of the students were gone. So my focus had been asking God to move in a powerful way in the fall. We wanted the first service of the new school year to be the beginning of a move of God. We wanted God to shake the auditorium and fill us with his Spirit like he had for the disciples in Acts. We wanted revival to break out on our campus.
Let Go of Control During Seasons of Waiting
Revival is a word we use to describe moments in history when the work of God seems to accelerate exponentially. There have been multiple monumental moments over the last two millennia—and as the new school year drew near, we spent the summer praying it would happen again.
We gathered a group of people to pray every Wednesday that the first Annex of the new school year would be different.
Then the fall finally came and, with it, the first service we’d spent so much time praying for. Students showed up. We sang. We heard a message. And people laughed and hugged as they caught up with friends in the lobby.
I didn’t stick around for all of that.
I left, furious and frustrated.
I wanted more.
More people.
More tears.
More salvations.
More goosebumps.
I wanted it so badly that I drove up a mountain to voice my annoyances to God. I reminded him of all those Wednesdays we’d sacrificed out in that field praying. I reminded him of the numbers I’d asked for, a quota we hadn’t hit.
I was exhausted.
I was angry.
And Jesus’s offer “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest” sounded too good to be true.
Because I thought I’d done that, but apparently it hadn’t worked. Instead of getting rest, I just got a heavier burden that made me even more weary.
How to Let Go of Control and Surrender to God
All these years later, that memory still makes me cringe. I have enough perspective to see how much of a control issue I had (and probably still have) in spiritual moments like those. That night and that first service should have been all about God, but I found a way to make it about me.
At one level, my cry for revival was pure.
But then there was an uglier layer beneath it.
I was looking for an emotive experience.
I was hoping for tears.
Let Go of Control Instead of Chasing Outcomes
I didn’t just want the night to ignite a revival in our city; I wanted reporters to write articles and historians to write books about how it was all sparked because a few college kids had the faith to pray every Wednesday for a whole summer. In other words, I wanted it to be about me. And I wanted it to be done on my timetable. All the prayers were simply my way of trying to control the outcome.
If I could speak to my younger self, I’d remind him that the soul rest that Jesus talked about is possible but that Jesus began that famous teaching with three essential words: “Come to me.” This radical invitation calls us to stop trying to control outcomes and focus more on surrender and trust. Because as image bearers, we get to play a pivotal part in this unfolding narrative God is telling. So much of which is above our pay grade.
The truth is, that service at the Annex was incredible. I’ve had conversations with two friends I respect deeply who say that night was a massive turning point for them. Which means, when I was up in the mountains shouting at God for not moving, they were telling their friends all about how God was moving. That’s about as humbling of a realization as you can get.
I couldn’t see it.
Because I was trying to control it.
Learning to Let Go of Control in Ministry and Life
I imagine you know the feeling. And you likely have your own version of how you try to control your spiritual journey. Let’s have some grace for ourselves, since the reason we try to control big moments is often that we care deeply.
We want the event to go smoothly.
We want the project to be a success.
We want lives to be changed.
Let Go of Control and Trust God’s Bigger Story
The problem isn’t that we care; the problem arises when care becomes control. That’s the moment we put self back at the center of the story and try to pick up that weight only an eternal God can handle.
Maybe you resonate directly with my story. After all, revival is an amazing North Star to shoot for, and there are ways to set yourself up to experience it (prayer, fasting, worship, etc.). But the frustratingly beautiful truth is that an element of revival is completely out of our hands. Frustrating because the part of us that wants control would sure love a five-step process for revival. Beautiful because it reminds us once again that God isn’t a means to an end. The breakthrough isn’t the goal; God is the goal.
Sometimes breakthrough does come, but other days it doesn’t. Pray for it and pursue it with shameless audacity, but practice letting go of control at the same time. Because the day you learn to surrender the outcome, ministry will get a lot more fun.
Along the way, you just may start to notice how often God is working behind the scenes.
Adapted excerpt from Free Me from Me by Ryan Wekenman. Copyright © 2026 by Ryan Wekenman. Published by WaterBrook, an imprint of Penguin Random House Christian Publishing Group, LLC. Used by permission.
Ryan Wekenman is a storyteller and pastor who is passionate about finding creative ways to help people explore life’s biggest questions. He is the author of Single Today and Free Me from Me, and the co-host of two podcasts, Stories in Scripture and Afterthoughts, a weekly conversation about faith, culture, and the church. He has a master’s degree from Talbot School of Theology and is the teaching pastor of Red Rocks Austin, a young, vibrant church he helped start with a few of his best friends. He lives in Austin, Texas.
