Living Differently

Family, Personal Development, Perspectives

Living Differently Begins with Loving God

Jesus was once asked, “Which is the most important commandment?” (Matt. 22:36 NLT).

He said, “‘You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. A second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself ’” (Matt. 22:37–39 NLT).

Love God.

Love others.

Of course that begins with receiving His love.

Do you know how much Jesus loves you?

I, myself, got confused. If you asked me, I would tell you God loved me, but my emotions betrayed what I believed deep down in my heart—that I needed to be good to be loved.

Obedience Is a Response to God’s Love

Here’s where it gets challenging: There are rules in the Bible. And they matter.

Not because we can earn God’s love, but to help us express it.

We don’t obey to be loved.

We obey because we are loved.

That results in loving others well, because when we express His love in obedience, we don’t hurt each other.

I am not just asking you to live differently—I’m inviting you to love differently.

God’s Design for Marriage and Oneness

God uses many things to teach us about His love including marriage between one man and one woman. This is why it’s such a beautiful thing when a bride and groom become “one flesh” (Gen. 2:24).

Oneness is at the heart of God’s intention for marriage. Sex will be one part of that, but there’s much more to it. The Bible has a specific Hebrew word for it: yada

Yada: to know, to be made known.

With not one mention of our bodies, yada has more to do with emotional and spiritual familiarity. When the Bible describes a husband and wife as “one flesh,” it means much more than connecting their bodies. It’s total unity – physical, emotional, spiritual, and relational. Two lives becoming deeply connected in every way.

Understanding Sexual Integrity and Whole-Life Commitment

This raises an important question: What happens when physical intimacy is separated from whole-life commitment?

“To have physical union without having whole-life union is a lack of integrity” —Tim Keller.

Let’s think about the word integrity.

It comes from a Latin root word that communicates that something is whole or undivided. When we combine integrity and sexuality, we mean that we view our sex and gender as parts of our total being. They are consistently integrated into our lives, rather than split off.

What Christian Sexual Integrity Looks Like

One of today’s most respected Christian teachers and clinical psychologists, Dr. Juli Slattery, has dedicated her life to helping the church understand sex. She says sexual integrity shows up like this:

“My sexual choices are a consistent expression of my relational and spiritual commitments” —Juli Slattery.

When Culture Separates Sex from the Soul

Here’s the problem: Culture talks about sex without the soul. The church talks about the soul but rarely about sex. Many people are left with disjointed lives—either following their desires without discipleship or following Jesus while silently battling their sexual desires alone.

And then there’s modern technology: You don’t even have to be with someone to experience sexual pleasure. Things like porn separate the act from any attempt at whole-life intimacy. This is creating a terrifying trend: fewer real relationships.

Technology and the Challenge of Biblical Intimacy

And here’s what’s honestly kind of scary: Technology like virtual reality and artificial intelligence is about to escalate that trajectory. High-tech goggles or devices will simulate fake relationships that feel very real. Satan has masterminded a pathway for us to separate sex from all relational and spiritual commitments. Entirely.

Why Christian Relationships Need Integrity and Commitment

In the middle of all this, 70 percent of young women want Christian men to “man up” and ask them out.⁶ They’re frustrated with boys who spend hours lost in Call of Duty while ignoring God’s actual call on their life to rise up, take responsibility, and step into manhood.

Living Differently Through God’s Design for Intimacy

That longing isn’t shallow—it’s holy. This frustration is a cry for integrity. Deep down, it reflects a yearning for a world where sex isn’t separated from emotional depth and spiritual commitment. God’s good design for intimacy still lives in the hearts of His children.